All posts tagged: emotions

Deconstructing Narcissism: A Model of Emotional Dynamics of the Narcissistic Personality

Introduction: With the aim of simplifying and clarifying my own understanding of the dynamics of the narcissistic personality, I set out to create a simple, clear flow chart. In particular, I wanted to link the grandiose narcissistic behavior, with narcissistically-injured/deflated narcissism, and other forms egocentrism can take.  What I ended up with was not the neat, simple chart I had in mind. Instead, I got the thing above. Still, it helped me to clarify a bunch of stray thoughts, experiences, and theory associated with narcissism. I’ll do my best to go through the different components and make it more clear. Inside Out: The first thing to know while looking at the chart is that the center represents what the narcissist feels, and would express if asked. For the narcissistic organization, it’s important to understand that the area of emotional awareness is very small.  Most of the big and powerful emotions are outside of conscious awareness. However, the narcissist will likely only experience a diffuse sense of anxiety and/or depression. On the outermost area of the …

Trigger Warning: Four Reasons to Remove the Word “Triggered” from Your Lexicon

The word “triggered,” which I used to hear only in mental health circles, has now fully permeated everyday language.  What was once a term created to refer to the behavioral response (e.g., dissociation, panic, flashbacks) to cues resembling a specific, circumscribed, traumatic event, has evolved into having at least three additional common uses. First, the evocation of a painful emotion: “I was really triggered when she interrupted me and started talking about herself.” Second, a derivative of the first with a more narrow application, the elicitation of offense or political outrage: “The way the terms “poor people” and “racial minorities” were used interchangeably was highly triggering.” Third, its reappropriation for satirical use: “Stay triggered snowflakes” is Tomi Lahren’s, the provocative conservative political pundit, catchphrase. I confess to feeling annoyed with all of these uses, including the original use of the word.  When the opportunity presents, I steer clients away from using this term, for reasons (beyond my own annoyance) I will explain.  In no particular order, I list my reasons for cringing at the word …