Mindsplain Book Review: The 5 Love Languages. The Secret to Love that Lasts
What’s “The 5 Love Languages” About?
Relationship expert Dr. Gary Chapman tackles one of the most common issues relationships face today-how to make love last. Chapman offers readers a remedy, which he discovered from years of experience in working with couples. With clear examples and uplifting storytelling, Dr. Chapman reveals the various ways we express and receive love, known as love languages. Countless amounts of couples have experienced richer levels of intimacy from learning their love languages-and this book will help you get started in understanding yours.
Key Takeaways from The 5 Love Languages
- There are five unique love languages – quality time, words of affirmation, gifts, acts of service, and physical touch.
- Love languages represent the way we receive love. Chapman concludes that once you identify and learn how to express your partner’s primary love language, you’ve discovered the key to a long-lasting, loving relationship.
- The way that you understand love isn’t always the same as your partner’s. It’s rare for relationships to share the same love language, the goal is to identify them and learn how to express them in a way you both understand.
- Awareness is one thing-action is another. Just because your partner knows your love language doesn’t mean things will automatically change. It takes a conscious effort and time to do the things that make your partner feel most loved.
- Your love language can change on occasion. The key is to communicate with your partner and put it into practice.
- Anyone can learn to speak any of the five love languages. Most of us grew up knowing only one or two of them, while the others must be learned. Speaking your partner’s love language takes a small amount of effort and intention.
- There are a few ways to discover your love language, which include: observing how you or your partner express love most often, paying attention to complaints, and noticing requests. Chapman also developed a quiz that you can take here.
The 5 Love Languages: Overall Rating-4/5
The Caduceus represents Hermes and all domains associated with him. Some of the most well-known associations with Hermes are trades, occupations, commerce, negotiation, printing, writing, and eloquence.
However, the characteristics of the Caduceus invoked here are its power to awaken the sleeping, put the conscious to sleep, ease the pain of death, and revive the dead.
The 5 Love Languages is as useful as it is insightful. In short, practically anyone in a relationship could benefit from reading this book. Whether you’re a young newlywed wanting to start your marriage on the right foot, or you’ve been married for 40 years and feel your connection is fading.
On the other hand, it’s essential to note that working on relationships is important but won’t always “save” them. Yes, improving communication is helpful, but those involved in an emotionally abusive or manipulative relationship should proceed with caution. This book tends to minimize the damage that can be caused in these situations by reaching out with love languages. Sacrificing yourself to save a toxic relationship is a serious risk that’s often dismissed throughout the book.
Overall, the knowledge Chapman presents is valuable. If communication and understanding aren’t the primary concerns in your romantic relationship, you’ll benefit from learning how you can use love languages with other people you care about.
Book APA Reference
Chapman, G. D. (1995). The five love languages: How to express heartfelt commitment to your mate. Chicago: Northfield Pub.
References
https://www.5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/
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