All posts filed under: Psychology and Society

how_to_be_happy_when_the_world_is_suffering

How can I be happy when others are suffering?

We live in an interconnected world–a world where the 24-hour news cycle and social media confronts us with the most extreme ends of human experience.  One hour, we might be watching the Kardashians vacation or unwind in their multimillion-dollar mansion.  The next hour (or perhaps even the same hour!) we could be scrolling through instagram seeing haunting images of oppression, invasion, illness, destruction, and other powerful stories of the most profound levels of human suffering. Whether we find ourselves more engaged with those we envy or those we pity, our voyeurism is sure to leave us in a darker place than where we started. It’s true that we would be better off if we simply disengaged.  Stop doomscrolling. Stop engaging with trolls.  Stop watching the news.  Stop immersing yourself in the lives of the rich, beautiful, and overindulged.  But that advice might be skirting a very rational question: how can we be happy when others are suffering through no fault of their own? The first question: do you really want to not suffer? If you’re …

The Importance of Free Play

Free Play: Why It’s Important and How to Get Your Kids to Participate

Guest Post by Shalom K. Introduction Play is a crucial part of any child’s growth and development. It is a means for them to explore new things, learn, and develop. Your child learns to depend on their capabilities, building their self-worth and self-esteem. Having raised my kids full time and homeschooling them, I have had to come up with strategies that will help them engage in play and learning. Before we get to the strategy, let’s first understand what free play is and why it’s so essential for kids. What is Free Play? Free play is any unstructured, voluntary, child-initiated activity that lets kids develop their imagination while exploring their environs. It is the spontaneous play that is born from a child’s curiosity, enthusiasm, and love of discovery. It can include playing with dolls, blocks, crayons, clay, paper, and so on: anything that allows free, creative play. Outdoor play is the best form of free play. When kids are outside, they explore different things in nature and discover bugs they would have otherwise missed if …

Envy & Destroying Others' good fortune

Envy: The Camouflaged Emotion

More and more I encounter an emotion in patients that is quiet, hidden, nagging, and insidious.  Most people seem surprised when it’s named, and the notion of inviting an open exploration of the feeling in their relationships seems quite unthinkable.  To own the emotion feels shameful, and the detection of said emotion elicits guilt in the perceiver. It’s a primitive feeling we can easily recognize, yet conveniently tend not to take notice of.  What is the feeling?   Envy. It’s at the heart of relationship problems, in families and between lovers.  Its corrosive properties lurk at the heart of political divides and toxic discourse.  Individuals and groups grow further apart and disparities emerge, more seeds of envy are sewn. What is the Experience of Envy? One thing I find interesting about envy is that it is much easier to feel than it is to define.  As stated above, it’s primitive and easy to access in our bodies. But what exactly is it?   Before defining it, I invite you to feel in your body.  Bring to mind …